Friday, April 26, 2013

Black Eye!

My boyfriend and I were going at it pretty good, mostly oral. It's already awkward due to the fact that I'm 15 weeks pregnant. My guy loves going down on me though. Anyways, the room mate walks in. Not your typical "walked-in-on" story.. Because my boyfriend and I both hear the door before it opens completely, he throws the cover over both of us.. and in the process smacks me straight in the eye. We all had a good laugh. Eye still hurts though... Wonder if the doc's will believe I walked into a door..or if they'll start asking me if I feel safe at home at my next appointment

bad threesome

hey iv got a really embarrassing story so here i go i was at this party and this guy walked up to me and says hi i'm chad can i get you a drink so i was like what the hell why not so after a while i was really drunk and he goes do you wanna come for a ride in my car so i'm like okay and takes me back to his house and i was so horny and he goes you up for a threesome and i'm thinking ohgod not good but i did anyway and so i start sucking this random guys dick and chad started to give me anal and we were 20 minutes in and i started to feel really sick and my knows was itchy as hell all of sudden i sneezed and bit this poor guys dick and he was screaming i split him open and to make things worse i kinda shat on chads dick since that day we have never talked and every time i see him its so awkward.

Sad Attraction :(

I'm friends with this guy and he and I have always had this unusual sexual attraction toward each other. We never acted upon said attraction though. 
One day, we were talking about our odd desires and I told him a few different things; but he specifically focused on my desire for some type of mark on my skin. I said that I wanted a hickey. I never got one before, so why not?
When I told him I wanted that, he said he would be the one to give it to me. I agreed that he could.
A few weeks ago, we were talking and I told him I wanted to meet up with him. I met him at this park by his house because his family was home and I wouldn't do anything knowing they were there.
When he got in my car, he immediately leaned over and kissed me. It was a pretty good kiss... but his breath was BAD. While he was kissing me, he started lifting up my shirt and squeezing my breast. After a few seconds, he slid his hand down into my pants. I told him that he could finger me because he told me that he could make me come quickly. So he put his hand down there and starts to stroke me. I told him to do something else because it wasn't doing much for me. He moved over a little while he started to suck on my breast. I thought it would feel really good, so I was excited about it... but I could barely feel it because I was too distracted over what was happening down low... He was getting really rough; but not in a good way. I told him that I would do it to help him out. I tried to take over and he pushed my hand out of the way!
So when it was all over, it took over 30 minutes till I finally came... not quickly like he bragged. I smelled his breath on my lips and even my boobs, so that was nasty.
The hickey lasted almost 2 weeks too... Every time I took my shirt off, I had to look at the terrible reminder of the bad decision I made.
Not gonna happen again.

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Cheating Fun!!

Several years ago, I was supposed to meet my girlfriend in a pub, for my birthday. She couldn't get away from university, so I thought, what the hell, I'll still go out. Anyway, I bumped into a lass from my school days ago I'd always had a thing for. I was feeling neglected and she was also having a bad night having been stood up herself, so we had a drink then, after lots of flirting and touching, decided to go back to mine. Now I lived out of town so needed the last train home. We got on, and seeing the carriages almost empty decided to get started there and then. Now I have a thing for public fun so I was really enjoying my birthday. However the conductor came down the train, just as I was coming inside this lass. Needless to say we got thrown off, and had to walk the rest of the way home. She was mortified, but she did let me fuck her all over again at mine, and this time let me film her. It didn't put her off, she came back several times, and once we actually managed to finish on the train after leaving the club.
My girlfriend did treat me to an amazing belated birthday blowjob because she felt guilty for missing my birthday, if only she knew, it had been very memorable indeed."

Awkward Anal sex!!

Back when I was with my ex, we decided to try anal sex
Now in the converations we had i assumed that I'd be the one giving the anal.
I was wrong.
Came back to the flat to find her wearing a strap on.
After a hasty, awkward confrontation we went back to normal, traditional sex.
we broke up soon after that."

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Fire's Suck!

Okay so the most embarrassing sex story for me was with my current fiance. Well we live in a shelter at the time and we were just finished getting super high so we got a little horny. It was around 8. When you're high you get paranoid like a bitch. So we started fucking with no hesitation. All of our clothes are off and my man is on top just sliding in next thing you know we here a big BANG AND SCREAM SAYING FIRE. My fiance jumps out of me so fast grabs my 4 month old sleeping son leaves me on the bed naked. He's running out the door naked covering his penis with his effing hand ... when he gets down stairs our room mates start dieing of laughter . They set the whole shit up . So now everyone knows how big my fiance's dick is and how loud the baby can cry when being woken up . Lol I was so pissed that he left me to die. I will never let him live it down I swear I won't

Ouch!

When I was younger I dated this guy that was four years older than me. We were in my dad's bathroom, which was right next to the living room. Some of our friends were over. He wanted a blowie, I was cool with it. I'd never given head before.. and I had braces. We started going at it. I'm trying to please him the best way I knew how, going fast, so I thought. I ended up scraping the top of his dick with my braces. He was a douche about it. Even though I was super sorry and embarrassed, he went out and told everybody. So not only did I have skin from his dick stuck in my braces but I was also mortified! Needless to say I didn't do oral after that for a long time lol.

This is just awkward :P

OK so this just happened the other night. I had finally got my daughter to bed and my husband was at work, before I got in the shower I decided to play with my "toy". So like half way into it the batteries went DEAD. So I did what any other person would do. Went to get new batteries. I made it down stairs to the kitchen and began to search for new batteries. When all of a sudden the front door opens. And there I was standing butt ass naked, in my kitchen, with a blue vibrator in my hand in front of my husband and 3... that's right 3 of his buddy's from work. I was mortified! Frozen from shock and embarrassment, my face blood red. As soon as they made it to thru the house and into the garage I booked it upstairs and stayed there until they were gone. The worst part is one of the guys comes over everyday for dinner.

This happens a lot!

This was funny and embarrassing (anonymous).....so me and my ex bf hadn't seen each other a very long time we had dated each other for 2 years, when we reunited, we were having a conversation and one thing led to another...inside his sisters van lol....so we were doing our things I was a little scared to get caught by someone and I kept trying to look out the window to make sure no one was going to pop up..he tells me to relax and I let my guard down when all of a sudden his sister opens the door, jumps in and starts driving talking about the cops looking for him and all this stuff... she had no idea what we were doing and I was laughin my ass off thinking she knew... Then i realized she still had.no idea so there we were both butt naked with his sister driving all wild talkin about some crazy shit and we all getting dress in the back lol...after i was done n we stoped i asked her if she saw anything and she was clue less then haha idk if she was.playing it off or she really didnt see anything but it was pretty funny.

Foofie!

"Me and my ex were up for a bit of outdoor fun one day so we drove off to a country park for some fun, we walked for ages and found a lovely spot by the side of a pond, the sun was shining and everything was going really well until he got to the vinegar strokes...all of a sudden there was a crashing through the undergrowth and this bloody great Doberman came steaming out of the bushes beside us and leapt into the water. My bloke was so startled he turned around, stark bollock naked and tripped over a tree root, falling face down in the mud. The dog walker had a great view of me falling backwards into a patch of nettles.
Never again...I spent the rest of the day dabbing my foofie with calamine lotion and having to get my bloke to dig bramble thorns out of my arse..."

Thursday, April 18, 2013

wtf

While watching the final four on TV at a friends house with some of his friends that I don't know. Things kind of started to get weird and two of the guys just started to make out and then stopped and asked if I wanted to join. Being a straight guy I said no. But they kept insisting and next thing I know they were holding me down and trying to take my pants off. I tried to get them off but my friend just told me to give up and let them do it. And we'll I'm pretty ashamed to say all the fighting did turn me on. Lets just say I didn't do some straight thing that day."

WTFF

While watching the final four on tv at a friends house with some of his friends that I don't know. Things kind of started to get weird and two of the guys just started to make out and then stopped and asked if I wanted to join. Being a straight guy I said no. But they kept insisting and next thing I know they were holding me down and trying to take my pants off. I tried to get them off but my friend just told me to give up and let them do it. And we'll I'm pretty ashamed to say all the fighting did turn me on. Lets just say I didn't do some straight thing that day."

Damn!!

So I was seeing this girl a while back and she had asked me over to her house since her parents were away for the weekend and she had the place to herself. So I'm thinking get in there, as you would, even though her house is quite a bit away. So after a replacement bus instead of a train and a taxi to her house we finally start to get down and dirty. I'm in my boxers and she's completely naked, I've been the gentleman and given her oral and fingered her then she's lying giving me a hand job with my boxers still on. I say to her, "I need to go home in these remember" as a hint for her to go down and return the favor when she comes back with the epic, "Ohh, do you wanna finish yourself off in the bathroom?". I called a taxi and left, not spoke to her since.

dAMN!!

So I was seeing this girl a while back and she had asked me over to her house since her parents were away for the weekend and she had the place to herself. So I'm thinking get in there, as you would, even though her house is quite a bit away. So after a replacement bus instead of a train and a taxi to her house we finally start to get down and dirty. I'm in my boxers and she's completely naked, I've been the gentleman and given her oral and fingered her then she's lying giving me a hand job with my boxers still on. I say to her, "I need to go home in these remember" as a hint for her to go down and return the favor when she comes back with the epic, "Ohh, do you wanna finish yourself off in the bathroom?". I called a taxi and left, not spoke to her since.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Cops Suck

This is more awkward then embarrassing really 
So my "friend" had picked me up to go back to his, on the drive we messed around a little with each other n I was ready to go as soon as we pull up unfortunately as we pull up all I see is blue flashing lights and I look round and its an unmarked police car! So he tells me to stay in the car while he gets out n talks to them n locks me in. He comes back n tells me that they thought his car was stolen then he say just go to the front door when he says, a few minuets later I get a text saying "now" so I go in it must of been a real turn on for him because we didn't even make it to his room after that he took me from behind on the stairs. i felt slightly bad for him that he had to talk to the cops with a hard on n I was sat in the car but it was a bit of a thrill really

Cops Suck!

This is more awkward then embarrassing really 
So my "friend" had picked me up to go back to his, on the drive we messed around a little with each other n I was ready to go as soon as we pull up unfortunately as we pull up all I see is blue flashing lights and I look round and its an unmarked police car! So he tells me to stay in the car while he gets out n talks to them n locks me in. He comes back n tells me that they thought his car was stolen then he say just go to the front door when he says, a few minuets later I get a text saying "now" so I go in it must of been a real turn on for him because we didn't even make it to his room after that he took me from behind on the stairs. i felt slightly bad for him that he had to talk to the cops with a hard on n I was sat in the car but it was a bit of a thrill really

Monday, April 15, 2013

Something stupid :P

So this is more funny than embarrassing... when me and my girlfriend (now wife) were in high school we would get a chance to have sex at my house cause there was always somebody at her house. So one day my parents weren't home and wouldnt be home til late that night so we decided to get busy. It started off nice and easy then as we both got into it I just started poundin harder and harder. At some point I look up at my headboard and everything on it is moving including a picture frame I had on it. It eventually worked its way to the edge and falls off and the corner of it hit my wife right in the forehead. We both bust out laughing and eventually finished

Something stupid :P

So this is more funny than embarrassing... when me and my girlfriend (now wife) were in high school we would get a chance to have sex at my house cause there was always somebody at her house. So one day my parents weren't home and wouldnt be home til late that night so we decided to get busy. It started off nice and easy then as we both got into it I just started poundin harder and harder. At some point I look up at my headboard and everything on it is moving including a picture frame I had on it. It eventually worked its way to the edge and falls off and the corner of it hit my wife right in the forehead. We both bust out laughing and eventually finished

Dont fuck your managers Daughter

I happened to meet this girl on a night out, she was gorgeous might I add but I only took her number (oh well). So we decided to meet up few more times until she suggested we went over hers as she had a free house.. Things went from one thing to another until we had sex.. We met up in that week again, went over hers she had a free house again started going for it when her mother walked in on us completely naked full on going for it.. I noticed her mother was also my manager in work which was a huge shock! Worst part was it was me and her mother working the early shift in the morning.. Yes just me and her.. Safe to say couldn't look her in the eye anymore haha!!

Dont fuck your managers Daughter

I happened to meet this girl on a night out, she was gorgeous might I add but I only took her number (oh well). So we decided to meet up few more times until she suggested we went over hers as she had a free house.. Things went from one thing to another until we had sex.. We met up in that week again, went over hers she had a free house again started going for it when her mother walked in on us completely naked full on going for it.. I noticed her mother was also my manager in work which was a huge shock! Worst part was it was me and her mother working the early shift in the morning.. Yes just me and her.. Safe to say couldn't look her in the eye anymore haha!!

Sunday, April 14, 2013

Double Fun

Okay this is more akward than embarrassing. This happened about 2 years ago with my current boyfriend. Well we lived with my parents at the time and we were in the garage hanging out with my sister and his brother. Well they had decided to go get cigarettes and some weed. Soo anyway we thought we'd have enough time to go do the deed. Well apparently not bc my sister ended up walking in on is to tell us they were back. Now the most awkward part is after we finished up we went out to the garage to find my sister and his brother doing it! Most awkward night ever.lmao

Double Fun!

Okay this is more akward than embarrassing. This happened about 2 years ago with my current boyfriend. Well we lived with my parents at the time and we were in the garage hanging out with my sister and his brother. Well they had decided to go get cigarettes and some weed. Soo anyway we thought we'd have enough time to go do the deed. Well apparently not bc my sister ended up walking in on is to tell us they were back. Now the most awkward part is after we finished up we went out to the garage to find my sister and his brother doing it! Most awkward night ever.lmao

We were too slow!

This just happened to me last night actually. So my boyfriend and I spend a lot of time at my brother's house. I practically live there. Anyway, my brother's girlfriend also lives with him. At this point in time my brother was at work and my sister in law was at college doing something. The boyfriend and I had just went out to eat for dinner and we come back to find the house empty. So naturally we start making out and things get heavy. My phone rings, so I go and answer it, it's my sister in law asking if we wanted anything to eat. We had just eaten so I tell her no. So I hang up the phone and jump back in with my boyfriend. I hear a little crackling noise and couldn't figure out for the life of me what it was. Turns out it was the door unlocking and my sister walks in. Damn she got there fast! We both pulled the cover over ourselves and she just walks in, with her food, sits down on the living room couch oblivious to what just happened starts eating and watching tv. We sat there naked under that blanket for about an hour until we could manage to put clothes back on without her noticing.

Seriously Embarrassing!!

So my girlfriend and I enjoy doing random things in bed. Well we had broken up at one point for a day and decided to not end our relationship over something stupid. We agreed to not have sex until our trust in each other was back to what it had been. So we went to dinner a week later, and then ice skating. It was the day before she was supposed to go to college again so I wanted her night to be perfect. When we got back to my place, she decided to kick my roommate out of the house. Now I'm very oblivious when it comes to anything that has to deal with sex. But she made it clear that she wanted to have a little more intimate fun. She pushed me onto my bed and started kissing my stomach, and up my chest.she pulled my pants off and began giving me head, it felt amazing, and when she lifted her head I shot my load all over her shirt and neck. She freaked, and pulled her shirt off. She pulled her panties off and hiked up her skirt, and jumped onto me, she started riding me like shed never done before, and I started spanking her ass. Now in my unfortunate lust, I went to spank her just as she was going up, I missed her completely and smacked myself in the testicles. I screamed in pain and she jumped off of me. She put her shirt on and shouted when her shirt, now inside out smeared my cum over her face. She creaked about getting cum in her eye, and my other roommate busted in my door, claiming he'd heard yelling, he stared there for a second before turning around and walking away. To this day, my gf can't look at my roommate  and I no longer spank her if she's on top 

It always is risky outside!

Keep anon please!!!!!! me and my fella of 6 years were on holiday we arrived at the hotel we both got a bit horny so decided to get down and dirty I thought it would be a good idea to go out on the balcony as it was dark and seemed quiet with nobody about, well we thought! So my fella was about to cum but before he did I screamed and jumped off him and it went all over him ha!...reason being was an old man grinning at me from the next balcony!!! Cringe!! Safe to say I won't be doing that again!!

Proposing while giving head? Something new!

Keep anonymous... This is more embarrassing for the guy but...so I was hanging out with this guy for a few weeks and we started messing around. We then got into the sex but I didn't want him to cum inside me so I said I would suck him off. I started sucking his d**k for a minute and he was about to cum. While he was getting off he said "oh my god, I want to marry you! You aren't going anywhere!" I had no idea what to say after that so it was really awkward. I was embarrassed for him most of all. After the clean up he said "that was some wifey s**t". Since I just started talking to this guy a few weeks before this it really put me off. I only sucked his d**k one time after that because I was afraid of his reaction lol.

Find a Room!

So my boyfriends mate held a 17th birthday party for him back in September. We all played pool and did shots when you lost and what not. Later on in the night when everyone has rocked up people were pretty wasted. I was out in the back yard with my boyfriend having a 'romantic' conversation when his mate fell on me and really hurt my ankle. My boyfriend picked me up and took me to his car. We sat in the back and talked for a while when he, out of no where pissed my shirt off and started rubbing me. Me being half drunk just sat there and nibbled his ear. I took off his shirt and shorts and he took off my shorts. Then we heard a knock at the window and it was his mate checking to see if i was alright (from my fall). My boyfriend hurried him to leave. Closed the window and picked me up and put me on his lap. He lifted up his ass and pulled off his underwear. After a bit of kissing and further undressing of me we established that there was no one out side of the car. We then started fucking. I kept hitting my head on the roof of the car. Which actually hurt. And because the way my legs were going my now swollen ankle really hurt.
After sex we got out of the car to find his mates in the car next to his filming the entire thing... I then did the limp of shame to the room we were sleeping in the get a round of applause from everyone in the house. Even his mates parents.

Double Bham!

Last night i was hanging out with my boyfriend and a friend of his, That i had just met!! We had been drinking and decided to go back to my place, When we got back to my place the three of us were just sitting on my bed. Im drunk and really horny so i start rubbing my boyfriends crotch with my foot, (he has a foot fetish). He tells his friend to go sit in his truck while we do out thing. After about 15 minutes of me riding him, he says hes not wearing a condom anymore! So i put a finger inside me and pull the condom out,,, and i kinda just hand it to him. . That in itself is embarrassing. BUT it gets worse. I didn't know where it ended up and i didn't care and we just kept going at it. This morning, my boyfriend and his friend come over. Well, his friend goes to get a soda out of the mini fridge that's at the end of my bed and apparently that's where the condom had ended up.

Proposing while giving head? Something new!

Keep anonymous... This is more embarrassing for the guy but...so I was hanging out with this guy for a few weeks and we started messing around. We then got into the sex but I didn't want him to cum inside me so I said I would suck him off. I started sucking his d**k for a minute and he was about to cum. While he was getting off he said "oh my god, I want to marry you! You aren't going anywhere!" I had no idea what to say after that so it was really awkward. I was embarrassed for him most of all. After the clean up he said "that was some wifey s**t". Since I just started talking to this guy a few weeks before this it really put me off. I only sucked his d**k one time after that because I was afraid of his reaction lol.

badLuck!!

One night while I was living with my now ex boyfriend we had a few people staying the night and they all seemed to have passed out in our room well there was no other bed in the house and things were beginning to heat up. im not very shy so I said lets just make sure there asleep. So we did then we went on to do the dirty. Well I am verg loud so we were going at it doggy style so my face was in a pillow. Just as we both were about to come one of or friends doors up to tell us a full moon is out tonight that's wakes every one up. so i'm caught butt naked because my ex takes covers to cover his ass. To make matters worse when I stood up to go pee the cum that was inside me dripped out all over one of our friends sleeping face.

Pretty funny!!

This happened about 5 years ago. My now husband and I were at his house his parents weren't supposed to be home. His dad is a truck driver and his mom was out looking at there new house. So were sitting on his couch making out and one thing lead to another... We start going at it. He flips me over into doggie style position and he starts thrusting hard I'm butt naked DD boobs flopping all over the place. And all of a sudden his dad walks through the door... Sees me in all my naked glory and he just slowly backs out of the door. I run as fast as I can to my husbands room and hide while he talks to his dad. All his dad can say is I'm proud of you son... Now I live with his parents and me and my husband have a son. It's still hard for me to have sex with my husband when his dad is home

Bad Luck!!

when i was 17 i guess, my friend and i were hanging out with this chick. we were smoking, doing drugs and i told my friend to see if this chick wants to have sex with us. he being too scared made me ask. without much thought, she says yes. so i lay down ground rules (no kissing once a dick is in your mouth, dont cum in her, etc.). right as we are about to get going she said she didn't want to do anything with me since i had a girlfriend; of course i was pissed but went to the other room. my friend comes in minutes later to say she changed her mind. i hop on over and do my thing. when i pulled out to cum, some must have gotten on her. as she turns around to take more dick my friend stuck his hands in it!! BOTH HANDS! after wiping his hands, we hear a car horn. it was her mom to pick her up, my friend never even got to have sex with her! poor guy lost all the way around

awkward talk

The first time I went with the guy i'm dating I moved on top of him after a steamy foreplay session, we'd been biting, kissing, touching, going down on each other - it was all very hot. Plus he has the nicest cock I think I've ever seen... Anyway, I'm sat on top of him now, a leg either side, he's breathing quite heavily and his hands are exploring my body. I pull close to him in the sexiest way I know how, biting his lip and stroking his cock, then I whisper in his ear 'how do you want to fuck me?', to which he responds - 'how do you want to fuck me?' In that childish voice only ever used when you repeat something someone's said. Immediately he looked horrified at the realisation of what he'd actually just done and began to mumble something about being shy and talking dirty.. I was too put off to carry on.. We have great sex now but I'll never ask him a naughty question in the heat of passion again.

Anal Beads!

Me and my now ex loved to experiment whenever we could you name it we gave it a go. So one night he comes over and we whip out the handcuffs, blindfold, anal beads and lube. He handcuffed me to the bedpost, blindfolds me and starts teasing. After a coupling of minutes of this he starts slipping in the anal beads and brings me to orgasm before undoing the handcuffs so Ican hop on top. I ride him until he cums both of us completely forgetting the anal beads were still in me until we're both finished and knackered. Once I realise they're still in there I start trying to pull them out but all of my muscles have tensed up and I can't get them out at all!! 20 minutes of tears, pain, pulling and the thoughts of a possible hospital visit on the cards and he finally gets them out of me not since that day have I used anal beads and probably never will again!!

Well you should have listened

A few years back my ex and I where hanging out at my house. We were really horny and didn't want to get caught so we went outside to fool around. We sat at a bench and started making out, then went to foreplay, and then she decided to tell me that she is on her period. Frustrated I just tell her that we can just have anal sex. So I bend her over the bench and get to work. About ten minutes in she tells me to stop. Naturally during sex I ignore her and keep going. She then more loudly says please stop I'm gonna pee. For what ever reason, I didn't believe her so I started to pound her harder and then all of a sudden I feel something warm on my thigh. It was her pee. She just starts laughing and says I told you to stop!

Going like Rabbits!

Okay well when I was in high school, I had been dating a guy, he was my first and after that first time, we were like rabbits. Any and everywhere. One day my house was really crowded with family so we decided to take a walk to get away (which also included finding a place to do it). There was a woods behind my house and a cut through it that no one even used anymore, we had gone there a couple times for a quickie before so we decided to do that. We walked off to a little place you couldn't see from the road or the cut through and laid his jacket on the ground. For some reason, that day he had convinced me to get completely naked except for my hoodie. So I was on the bottom, nothing but an unzipped hoodie on and he tells me to switch to doggie style, we transitioned so fast that the hoodie lifted up, pretty much covering nothing but my arms, but heat of the moment, I didn't really care. I'm about to finish when I hear "oh my gosh look at that!" Abruptly my bf stops and I look over to see 2 boys, maybe about 7 or 8 years old, standing next to their bikes that apparently they were walking through the woods as a shortcut to the road. My bf and I sit there frozen for a second, he's still behind me, my boobs are hanging out in plain view then he just jumps in front of me while I scramble to get my clothes on and the boys speed off on their bikes. I got dressed really fast and we decided to go back to my house, thoroughly embarrassed, we get to the road and have to pass the same kids who just caught us in the act as they ride by us giggling.

Wear them slowly

A few years back my ex and I where hanging out at my house. We were really horny and didn't want to get caught so we went outside to fool around. We sat at a bench and started making out, then went to foreplay, and then she decided to tell me that she is on her period. Frustrated I just tell her that we can just have anal sex. So I bend her over the bench and get to work. About ten minutes in she tells me to stop. Naturally during sex I ignore her and keep going. She then more loudly says please stop I'm gonna pee. For what ever reason, I didn't believe her so I started to pound her harder and then all of a sudden I feel something warm on my thigh. It was her pee. She just starts laughing and says I told you to stop!

Security gaurds are a pain!

So this happened about five years ago when me and my ex were together. We were driving around during the summer and we both got in a mood. So we decided be were just going to park near the football field were NO one goes by late at night. So we were getting it on i was on top and all of a sudden we saw lights i got scared so i got off of him and got dressed as soon as i was pulling up my pants a security guard knocked on the window and said "I know what you're doing and i don't care that you're doing it just don't do it here" when he said that he was looking straight at me. I was so embarrassed because my mom knew the guy!

Strict Parents!

Alright so I have this ex and we used to go out to his caravan to 'watch movies ' corny I know but hay his parents were like 'omg don't touch her or you'll go to hell ' type strict and would actually lecture us everytime we kissed or hugged ( thank god they were also naive sons of bitches)
Anyway we were doing our usual thing, we used to like some soft core kinky shit, blindfolds and handcuffs with some aphrodisiac foods like whipped cream and strawberries...we were really getting into it, he was laying on top on me licking whipped cream off my nipples then sucking them lightly, just to tease me. I was getting really horny so I rolled on top and started to ride him, he was groaning and yelling making quiet a racket. Next minute We'd both just finished and his bloody dad burst down the down, waving a screwdriver...when he saw us he burst out laughing, apparently the whole caravan was shaking and with all the screaming he thought we were getting attacked! Just to add to the embarrassment his mum peeked through and said ' god it smells like sex in here'
safe to say we broke up after that but are still mates...his mum still can't look me in the eye

Drinking makes things bad!

this just happened last night keep anonymous plz.. Me and my ex from years ago wer hanging out at a bar he bought me drinks and i bought him some too. Soon we got feeling good and started making out so we went back to my place and i started giving him a blowjob after five minutes of me sucking his penis he started to breath heavy and was almost to an orgasm all of a sudden he starts shaking and yells shove your finger up my bum hole and milk me! I laughed so hard i had to stop he was so embarrassed he wouldn't even talk to me he just left.

Did i just have an orgasm?

Okay so this one time me and my ex were having sex i was pregnant at the time, well we had been going at it for a while and as i was have my peek I peed on him thinking i was only having an orgasms we get up to use the restroom when we were done and he was soaked. He told me to sniff him and as i did i busted out laughing telling him i peed on him he wasn't to happy. I was embarrassed but it was definitely funny.

Roommates Suck!

So when I was living in the dorms, I shared a room with another girl. I was single and ready to mingle, so I hooked up with an old flame. Super hot frat boy! I made sure my room mate was going to be gone at a study group for the next three hours, and I asked for some "personal time". So I snuck him in and we started the foreplay. All of our clothes were off and the condom was out. Suddenly we heard the lock, and I hide him under the pillows and blankets, and cover myself up. I played off that I was in the middle of dressing, and she proceeded to have a conversation with me obviously NAKED, but no clue there was a sexy naked man in my bed. Twenty minutes later, she used the bathroom and we kinda dress, but she is too fast, so he has to hide again! At this point, he wasn't breathing so well under my fuzzy comforter. It took her 45 minutes to leave, and she never knew! I kicked him out because the mood was ruined, and never tried to sleep with him again (we got caught our first try to sleep together too!)

Roommates Suck!

So when I was living in the dorms, I shared a room with another girl. I was single and ready to mingle, so I hooked up with an old flame. Super hot frat boy! I made sure my room mate was going to be gone at a study group for the next three hours, and I asked for some "personal time". So I snuck him in and we started the foreplay. All of our clothes were off and the condom was out. Suddenly we heard the lock, and I hide him under the pillows and blankets, and cover myself up. I played off that I was in the middle of dressing, and she proceeded to have a conversation with me obviously NAKED, but no clue there was a sexy naked man in my bed. Twenty minutes later, she used the bathroom and we kinda dress, but she is too fast, so he has to hide again! At this point, he wasn't breathing so well under my fuzzy comforter. It took her 45 minutes to leave, and she never knew! I kicked him out because the mood was ruined, and never tried to sleep with him again (we got caught our first try to sleep together too!)

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Keep a condom!

I was dating this girl for a while and we had sex pretty often. We went into my room and searched for a condom but couldn't find one so she just told me to pull out when i had to cum. So we go at it for a while and of course when i had to cum she was on top and it felt too good i couldn't say anything and i waited for the last second and i grabbed her hips and basically threw her off of me. She rolled back off the bed and hit her head on a chair. She was unconscious for about ten seconds then came to asking what had happened. I felt so bad afterwards i always make sure i have condoms available

Suprise!

So my husband (now x) and i always had trouble getting alone time with our 3 kids in the house. One night after hours of babying baby's we finally get them to sleep and go straight to the bedroom. We both know it may be awhile before we get this chance again, so we go at it like crazy ending with anal. We both get off and lay beside eachother very satisfied, when my husband rolls over to turn on the light and grab a smoke. We notice we are both covered in brown stuff (what we think is shit) both of us are mortified! He runs to get in the shower and i start stripping the bed when i hear "hey babe its fucking chocolate" then i notice the chocolate wrapper one of our kids snuck and hid in our bed expecting us not to notice ...... oh we noticed alright!

Tampon Fun!

Me and my boyfriend were at his dad's house, I needed a tampon but didn't dare ask as it was the first time we'd met, so he went and Said "have you got an ermm ermm" his step mum thought she knew what he ment and went in search for "a tampon" after searching for about 20 mins she pulled out some condoms. We then had to have the awkward conversation that I didn't need a condom but a tampon. We were all very embarrassed and uncomfortable for the rest of the 3 day stay.

Church Badluck

So, a couple of weeks after me and my boyfriend had split up we were texting, I was out drinking and like most people it makes me horny! Lol. So we decided I was going to go back to his for some 'fun'. His mum and step-dad were in so we had to be really quiet. Things got heated and I was giving him head when I thought I just had a bit of a runny nose, then I thought shit I really did have a runny nose! I opened my eyes and realised it wasn't snot, I was having a nose bleed, there was blood absolutely everywhere, we were covered in it! Anyway, the morning came and I got a taxi home, make up everywhere, blood over my top and tights in my hand, pretty obvious what I'd been up to. I got in the taxi and he said "erm isn't that the priests house you've just come out of!? Looks like you had a great night!" oh I forgot to say his stepdad is a priest, I also left my thong in the taxi! Was just my luck I got the same taxi driver the weekend after, yep he remembered!

Playground Fun

Last year I got talking to this man, our kids were friends, he's quite a bit older than me, but he was canny enough. After a while he invited me round for a cuppa, so I went and he was telling me how he liked me ect, next thing you know we go to kiss. Well all I could see were these teeth coming at me and then his lips round my chin and on my nose. He said he has only ever been with one person before, but that and the kiss didn't put me off, he took me to his bed. A single bed!! We get undressed, he gets on top and no word of a lie, after going in and out 2 times, he stops and kisses me, then in another 2 times, kisses. And this carries on for a while. Obviously he was doing it to stop him cumming so quick. So I thought, right, I will play with myself while he is in me, as it usually feels really good that way and I need some pleasure. So I put my hand down there, he looks and gets embarrassed and starts giggling. After half an hour of this, he finally finishes. Safe to say i never went back again, and try avoid him when we collect our kids from school. And I did get a message telling me it was the best he ever had. Pity I couldn't say the same ..

Face Creampie with own Cum!!


So this is a pretty good one, I was 17 and had a banging hot red headed girlfriend who was 27. I only had 20 minutes till I had to leave for work and we started going at it in her bed. The climax was amazing and we both came at the same time, just after wards her phone rang and she answered it still on top of me with me inside her still. She was gabbing away and I was gonna be late for work.
I put my arms above my head and was wiggling down out of the bed between her legs while she was gabbing away.
Sure enough right when my face is between her legs arms still above my head she starts laughing with her friend on the phone... Yea I got a huge cream pie all over my face and my automatic reaction was slamming my elbows into her stomach knocking the wind out of her.... lol

Parking Lot Embarrassment

My husband and I are not real dangerous but we were at our sons pee wee football game and it was half time. We had went out to smoke. He was teasing me all night with kissing my neck and ears and what not. So he says come on I have an idea. He gets me in the back of our SUV and proceeds to pull down my pants and panties, spreads my legs apart and goes to licking and it's feeling really good and I am about to cum for the 3rd time and I hear giggling. I freak out and we get up and I get my pants back up and look and there is this couple who was parked beside us and they just give us a look like oh yeah we know. I was so Embarrassed! My husband thought it was funny. He reminds me o that every time we pass that stadium.

Shocking Towel

My boss and I had an affair at work. We couldnt get enough of each other and had sex every chance we got. Store open and awaiting customers, didnt matter. One day we were going at it and made quite a mess and a customer came in so we quickly got redressed and hurrird out to the sales floor. After selling our customer what was needed I was laughing at the mess we had made, a little bit of his strange a little bit of mine. He tossed me a towel and said "use this". I hid the towel in the bathroom to take home and wash it. Needless to say I forgot to take it home and when I came into work the next day my coworker had the towel ON HIS HEAD. He said he was running late and he had washed his hair in the sink at work! I busted out laughing and couldn't look him in the face. When my boss came around the corner he busted out laughing as well. Our coworker didn't find the humor in the fact that he was wearing his bosses strange. He didnt believe what we had said when we basically openly admitted to an affair.Till this day I can't stop laughing whenever I think about it.

Neighbor fun!!

my best guy friend & i are neighbors so one night everyone was sleeping & so we hung out watching videos & talking then as usual one thing led to another so we started having sex on his couch then realized that his moms bed was on the other side of the wall so we moved to the floor. im a very loud person when it comes to sex so he tried to make sure to muffle my moans/screams so i wouldnt wake anyone up. then right as he was done cumming his mom woke up & we were buttnaked on the living room floor, he snatches the blanket off me to cover himself & i quickly dress (so quick i lost my underwear & put my pj's on backwards) & as soon as i pull my pjs up she comes walking through trying her hardest to see who i am b/c i turned my head since she doesnt know we have sex & as shes in the bathroom i ran out & when i got home he texted saying she heard us & knew it was me. the most embarassing thing was she found my underwear shoved in a cushion, washed, & gave them to him. we laugh so hard about it now lo

Neighborly Love

So my guy and have have been seeing each other for almost 2 years were both in our early 30's and each have a preteen. We spend a lot of weekend time at my place with the kids since we don't live together so we get creative when the mood hits us because now we can't just make the kids take a nap. Well we were in the kitchen whipping up some lunch when the mood struck and we went at it.... there's a small porthole opening that looks from the kitchen through the family room so we could see the kids coming down the hallway without them really seeing us so we were really getting into it. He had both of his hands full of my hair as I was bent over the counter hugging my coffee maker and biting down on a dish towel to stiffle to moans when the Backdoor in the kitchen flies open and there stands not only my neighbor but her mother and grandmother with front row seats to the show... I was mortified but my neighbors grandmother turns to her and tells her to take some lessons from me and maybe she'll eventually keep a man around lol

TMI

A few years ago my ex and I were going at it on our lunch break at his moms house, because it was a mutual place to meet only because we both worked on opposite areas, anyways we were really going at it with the lights off the bedroom door was cracked open. Finally reaching our climax, all if a sudden we see sunlight coming from outside. My ex jumps off of me I run to the bathroom not thinking my clothes were still on the floor, and I hear laughing.. Here I am thinking holy sh*t his moms home! I thought she was at work (she's a flight attendant) come to find out, it was his mom's boyfriend, and he knew we were doing it, so he went back outside because he was embarrassed as well and didn't know what to do. And I walked out Finally fully dressed to face the music flushed red and my ex and him were laughing and talking about how his mom's bf and his former gf(before my ex mom were together) were going at it and her son caught them... And telling us he had her spread eagle... tmi. Most awkward moment

Park Fun

Alright, so this happened two summers ago. My boyfriend and I had been together a few months and neither of us was particularly experienced, but we'd started messing around. We were hanging out in this park just outside of town, and since it's not used very often and we'd been totally alone for like an hour since we'd gotten there, we decided to go into the bathroom (a one room, one toilet little brick building) and have a little fun. My shirt and bra were on the floor and I was on my knees when there was a knock on the door. Since I'm not the sort of person who usually does this sort of thing in public, I freaked out and got dressed so quickly I scratched myself. It turns out an elderly couple had walked along the path behind the park and were sitting on the bench while they waited for the bathroom. The bench was far enough to the side that when the door opened, they couldn't see who was coming out. My boyfriend had to open the door and I had to slip out and move quickly with my back pressed to the wall around the corner, with the door concealing me so they wouldn't know there had been two people in there. It's funny now, but I stayed hidden behind that wall until they left, I was so embarrassed.

Sex in the open

I was at my boyfriends house,well boyfriends dads house, I went over there to watch a couple movies and cuddle, you know , girly kinds of things. We were both cuddled up on his couch watching the Disney movie tangled, well he started getting a little touchy feely, so I was like what the hell his dad is in bed. So I went along with it, and things started to really heat up, I was wearing jeans with a belt, so he un did my belt and pants and pulled my pants down just enough to do work down there. He was wearing basketball shorts so it was easy for him to just whip it out. So we are in the spooning position just going at it and I look up and his dad is walking into the kitchen, we both just freeze, my boyfriend asked his dad what he was doing awake , his dad couldn't sleep, then his dad noticed we were watching tangled and he decided to sit down on the chair right next to us an watch couple minutes of it, well couple minutes turned into the entire movie. And the whole time my boyfriend was still inside me. We still laugh about it till this day.

Boner Boy!!


About 3 years ago I took a life drawing class at my college. There we arrived at 10am and for 2 1/2 hours drew the human figure. Most of the nude models were other college students. Most of these models happened to be female as well. About a month into the semester we got our first male model. He did the job right, wasn't creepy, and seemed nice. One day our female nude didn't show up on time and our teacher calls the male model to replace her. WELL...about an hour in she finally shows up! Wouldn't you know the professor sees this as a great opportunity to use both models.
As soon as she took off her clothes and got onto the platform you could see how nervous he got. I think I may remember he wouldn't really look at her at first. She was curvy and very attractive. The first pose they were asked to stand back to back (her being alittle taller) with their hands intertwined. Well I think I know what everyone was thinking and were most of the female students were looking. Naked in front of about 20 students, and soon the female behind him, the poor guy gets a huge boner. It wouldn't go away. Our professor ignored it, the students tried to, and the guy looked like he was going to pass out from embarrassment. I don't have a great memory of the exact details, but eventually they had to turn around and the the other model saw it then. He was given the option to take a break but didn't respond or seem to want to speak. The next 40 minutes we watched him fight to control his boner only to see it swell up a few more times. After the class the laugher started and Boner~Boy was born!

Anal Fun!

I met someone at a club, he asked me to dance and things got a little heated on the dance floor. I decided to throw my rule book out the window and take him home. Nobody had ever got me that hot in a public place and so i went for it. I took him home and we could hardly control ourselves in the taxi. Inside my house we didnt waste much time and was soon naked, ( condoms issued etc) he was just so hot, the first time was pretty quick but we both came. Then i thought it was over so we made small talk, but he went at it again. Great. Im shouting out all sorts of things, completely lost in it, Only this time for some reason i shouted 'stick it in my arse' which i have never offered before... So he did.. It hurt like hell but i soldiered on cause after all id asked for it??! Then he cums.. but I hadn't ,. He puts a fresh condom on and goes back in my pussy with me on top at this point im thinking great he can still keep going??! So im riding him, and i cum and so does he. Hes grinning up at me and im thinking wow! Then we sort of smelt it.... When id came i had poo'ed. I am mortified!! I wanted him to leave but he just laughs and says 'well u asked me too fuck the shit out of u!' He gets up pulls the sheets off, whilst im hoping the ground swallows me up. Still so embarrassed i want to die, He cleans up the mess, even taking my sheets downstairs and putting the washer on. He then carries me into the shower and tries to calm me down. We get washed up, and as i get dried he makes the bed and then throws me onto the bed and he wants too go again!!! I expected him to freak out but i made a bigger deal out of it than him. We ended up dating for over a year but i never let him in my arse again.

Roommates Suck!

So when I was living in the dorms, I shared a room with another girl. I was single and ready to mingle, so I hooked up with an old flame. Super hot frat boy! I made sure my room mate was going to be gone at a study group for the next three hours, and I asked for some "personal time". So I snuck him in and we started the foreplay. All of our clothes were off and the condom was out. Suddenly we heard the lock, and I hide him under the pillows and blankets, and cover myself up. I played off that I was in the middle of dressing, and she proceeded to have a conversation with me obviously NAKED, but no clue there was a sexy naked man in my bed. Twenty minutes later, she used the bathroom and we kinda dress, but she is too fast, so he has to hide again! At this point, he wasn't breathing so well under my fuzzy comforter. It took her 45 minutes to leave, and she never knew! I kicked him out because the mood was ruined, and never tried to sleep with him again (we got caught our first try to sleep together too!)

Queefs!!

Well a few weeks ago my boyfriend and I were doing the deed. He goes on for a long time so when he finally pulled out and laid down he had apparently forced air up in my lady part from the in and out motion haha and I straight up queefed so loud! It sounded like a disgusting fart... He looks at me and says "oh, well... Excuse you!" In a teasing yet awkward sort of way and all I could say was "no that wasn't a real fart!" Lol I was so embarrassed :( he thought it was hilarious but I did not!

bondage Fun!

The finace' and I got a night off from the kids, so we took full advantage. I'm into bondage so I took off my shirt and bra and he tied me to the head board on my knees. He then took off my pants and layed em on the bed.We started going at it. He slapped my ass really hard and it made me scream. He's telling me how I have been bad and deserve punishment. 20 mins later my dad bust thru our bedroom door (they keep a key cuz my mom babysits). He gets an eyeful and runs out. Apparently my mom has to see for herself cuz she pops in and turns around quickly and walks out. We get dressed and go to find out what the hell is going on. We walk in on my parents convo which was one I never wanted to hear. My mom was asking my dad, "Why don't we try that tying up stuff?" My dad catches my eye and walks out the house. Mom then tells me they received a call from my phone and heard what he was saying, the slap, and my scream and thought he was beating me so they came to the rescue. That night I learned to never leave my phone in my pants and to make sure it is off before we have sex. Took a month for my dad to be able to talk to me face to face. Most embarrassing thing ever.

Shopping Fun

Here's my story. My ex girlfriend and I had lost our v cards to each other and were crazy for each other. So one day while we were at the mall we went to Dillard's. We found a dressing room and we started having sex. But we had some clothing to "try" on for reasons of we got caught. While she was riding me a lady came into the dressing room knocking on doors checking if people were in them, so we decided to finish and get dressed. But as she knocked on our door I came everywhere as my girlfriend stood up. The old lady witnessed it all. We were freaking out. I walked out and she stared at me and asked me what was wrong with me. I ignored her walked fast and called my girl and told her to meet me downstairs. We left and got back to her house. Worst thing is, that old lady was my girlfriends best friends grandma. But she never ratted us out.

Pregnancy is not a good time!

When i was pregnant with my daughter the doctors had told my husband that we had to have sex to simulate my cervix's to start to contract right. Well i told my doctor i wasn't really in the mood to fuck my husband cuz i was to tired. But anyways when it hit night time all of a sudden i was in the mood so we start having sex! hard core and right when he was about to cum my water broke on him! he was freaking out!! He thought he went to far deep and popped the water bag? Lol after he rushes me to the emergency room they had told him that the baby decided to come while we were having sex it was a normal thing lol now my husband says well at least she pushed the eject button during sex and not walking around the stores lol.

Never too old for Sex

By the time I turned 19, my girlfriend and I were already 1 year together. Our relationship had a lot of flare, and she was always getting freaky everywhere we went. We had already done it in the beach, her house, my house, movies, and the mall, but never the park. One day we were at the park close to her grandma's house around 8pm where everything was dark. We were already in the car when she started climbing up on me and taking my shirt off. She was really getting into it, since there was no one parked beside us. There was only one car but nobody was in there. As she was riding on me, moaning loud and all, I heard a loud thump that scared me. We both went down thinking that someone was going to see us. As we were lifting up our heads slowly to see outside what was causing the noise, I noticed that the car beside us was rocking back and forth, as if someone was really getting it on in there. We tried to see who it was, and my girlfriend was the first one to burst out with a scream of disgust. As I narrowed my eyes to see better who it was, I finally noticed that the couple in the car next to ours was my girlfriend's grandparents. I started laughing so hard that they heard me and they stared at us with great shock. At that moment all of us had our eyes wide open, having a very awkward and embarrassing moment. I will never forget that day. Now days, I always make fun of my girlfriend when we're about to have sex.

Tampon Fun

So iwas at the very end of my period, so barely spoting. Of course i let my fiance know, but he didn't care, he'd waited a week &still Wanted some. (He told me early in the morning) so at night after my shower i put in my tampon as usual, just incase i misjudged my period length, completely forgetting my fiance said he wanted to have sex that night... so fast forward to bedtime, he's layin there &i give him some head, and he starts to put it in, but for some reason couldn't get it in, so he feels down there &is like' i feel something there' &i swore up n down there was nth, (I FORGOT MY TAMPON WAS IN) so i went to the bathroom and quitly took it out, and went back to bed, and continue to deny there was anything there ! And we continued to do our do To this day ill never forget that ! So embarrassing

This isnt Narnia!

So me and my girlfriend at the time were at my house, and my mom had just left to go to the store, I thought we has enought time to have sex, so we went for it! Halfwau through, my mom comes back and my girlfriend ran in the closet. My mom walks in my room, opens the closet door, and sees my girl nakes. Not knowing what to do, she just says, "What? This isn't Narnia!!!" and walks out, i laughed so hard! haha!

I like to Pee!!

Here's my story, or one of many haha. I was on leave back in April, home for 10 days before I got stationed at my duty station. Marine Corps! Anyways, I had plenty of sex while on leave, but this was a first. So I hooked up with an old friend, we were getting it in every other day. The sex was great, we'd been talking about the next time I'd be home how we'd do this that and the third. So we're in my room doing the damn thing, I was on my 3rd nut I think.. So just as i'm about to release my beautiful unborn children or so I thought, I began peeing in her! Wow! I know, I know. She looks up at me and asks, "Did you just pee in me?" haha I start laughing my ass off! I told her no but who was I kidding. I got up went to the bathroom finish pissing and jumped right back in her! Needless to say we're still cool. She still wants the D despite the fact I'm 10,000 miles away!

Be quick!


Me and my ex boyfriend finally started having sex after 6 months. And after we started we did it ALL the time, we didn't care where we were at. It got to the point where we were really stupid about it. 
We'd do it in the house while everyone was there with my door unlocked and my parents in the room right next to us. 
And one day that finally came back to bite us in the ass.
(me and my little sister shared a room at the time)
So we were on her bed. And we were doing it when my mom walked in. Thankfully the only thing that was off were our pants and I managed to get mine on fast enough and sit up so that she didn't realize that we were having sex. She just thought I was giving him a bj. Lol
To this day my mom picks on me about it and tells me how gross my ex's butt looks.

Check your tent!

a few years back me and my boyfriend at the time decided to go camping with his friends, we were using the tent he used for night fishing. we wait for everyone to settle down then we started getting down to it, he stripped to his boxers then stripped me down to my underwear, we're kissing and groping, getting in to it when i got a sharp pain in my leg so i told him to stop as i couldn't pull my leg off the sleeping bag, he had a look with my phone light then freaks out saying he thinks i've got a fish hook in my leg but wasn't sure as he couldnt see. then he shouts his mate asking for a torch and his multi tool. his mate then barges in the tent with the torch shining on me, i'm there in all my glory, i couldn't even cover myself up with anything as the sleeping bag was stuck to my leg and my clothes were no where to be seen.

College Fun


It was my 1st semester in college, which was out of state. Well this guy from my hometown went there too, we weren't best buds or anything but he had a truck and I didn't. He mentioned he was going home for the weekend if I wanted to go, so I jumped on.

It just so happened to be my brothers birthday weekend so we was gonna throw a huge party! so he was there bc they were buddies. We were all drinking and having a great time, everyone was wanting to leave bc it was gettin really late...so he asked me if I wanted to cruise with him. So I went...well we had to take someone home who lived in the country...we were talking and he was like "wow I never knew how beautiful you really were in high school..." So we pull over start makin out, jump in the bed of his truck, have the most uncomfortable sex I've ever had my entire life simply bc I had a tire rod under my back...then we move back to the cab of his truck...when we were done...we couldn't find the condom...we figured it fell outside, so he takes me home and we discuss what time were leaving tomorrow...he goes home.

 The next day, he picks me up and says hey I'm sorry about last night, it was a line I shouldn't have crossed bc your brother is my friend...I reply back to him it's all good, I was just looking for a piece of ass too! We laugh it off and he gets a phone call from his roommate and says yeah ill be right there...we pick up his roommate and head back to college. I'm driving of course because he's too hung over. We're about to cross the state line and I'm looking for my cell phone squirming all over because I can't find it...

 His roommate sticks his hands but the seat of the single cab truck and says I found something gooey! And realizes what it was..IT'S THE LOST CONDOM!!! He slung it across the windshield, and it's full of cum...we have no where to pull over for miles because were on the turnpike... The guy and I can't help but just laugh!!!!

Gay Guys have a Prank


About 4 years ago I met this guy on Myspace when it was popping, we talked for about a month and decided we we'd hook up. I have a car so he gave me directions and I head over. As I'm pulling up this car is leaving and I see its a guy, don't think nothing of it.. He comes out and takes me inside and his brothers and one of their friends is sitting there and he introduces me and they're laughing hysterically at me. So I'm just like whatever. He takes me to his mom n dads room and shuts the door n tells me they're out of town. So clothes come off and I'm giving him head and it tastes like he had cum on his dick?? AND it smells and tastes like shit so I start gagging and he's all proud like 'yeah, you like that big dick huh'. So I pretended to choke just so I could get it out of my mouth. We hit the bed and start fucking, after awhile he's said he wants to nut and tells me to bend over and I'm thinking he's gonna blow his load on my ass and he tries to put it in my butt, now keep in mind I cannot handle it in my butt so I freak out and he just rides me doggy style and pulls out to bust. He finishes and heads to the bathroom and while he's in there his phone was on the stand next to where I was getting dressed so I look at it and it says 8 missed calls and the name says 'Shane ♥' ,.. Again I didn't think anything of it.. He comes out and call's 'Shane ♥' back and says 'oh I'm not home yet, just go to my house n tell my brothers you're there to see me and you'll wait in my room'
Then he turns to me and says 'um stay in here and be quiet! Ima go jump the fence and walk around like I just got here.' Then he calls his brothers in and tells them the 'plan' and tells em to walk me out when he goes in the room with them. ..Now I'm like ok wtf is going on?! So I stay in the room and his older brother stays in there with me while he's hopping the fence and out of nowhere starts laughing? I asked him what was so funny and this guy can seriously not stop laughing! He caught his breathe and says "so what's it like tasting another guys asshole?"
I gave him a wide eyed look and asked "WHAT?!"
Then he says "Dude, you just hooked up with a flamer!" I'd never heard that word before so I ask what's a 'flamer'??
 He says "He's fuckin gay!! He just fucked another guys ass before you got here and the one that's coming now, he's probably gonna fuck him to!!' Embarrassing! His brothers knew what I was there for and they just let it happen! Now I have nothing against gay people! I love em! :) but disgusting that I had the taste of ones ass in my mouth that night!

Too Drunk :D

My embrassing story. One night, i was on the prowl. my boyfriend had dumped me and i was on the rebound. My girlfriends took me out for a hot night on the town in redlands. I got wasted, went home with this guy, he was a little skinny, but what ever... beer and whiskey sure did help me get past that. We hooked up, apparently i was screaming ( that good, but too drunk to remember ) anyway. half way through, im like - i need to go pee, i leave, he passes out, i get lost on the way back to his bedroom and crawl into bed with his roommate; totally naked! Guy comes looking for me and wakes him and girl friend up, then me. i was mortified, walk of shame, back down the hall.

Allgeric Reaction


One night before bed, me and my boyfriend at the time decided to do our nightly ritual of getting off. I live by the oath that I was taught to give my man a blow job at least once a week. So this night was the night. After I swallowed him I lied down next to him proud of myself. About 45 mins to an hour later, I wake up choking. My throat is closing and it feels like liquid is flowing freely from my throat into my lungs and stomach. I am panicked no doubt and wake him up to take me to the ER.

Once we are there the doctor rushes to me and asks me if I am allergic to any medicines. I am unable to talk but my boyfriend tells him yes I am allergic to Penicillin. The doctor states that I am having an allergic reaction and wants to know if I ingested Penicillin. I quickly shook my head no, knowing I am deathly allergic. He asks well if you haven't ingested it how did you get it in your system, at that point my boyfriend is very embarrassed and says under his breath I am taking it. The doctor looked confused for mere seconds and then smiles. He says I can stop this reaction for you this time, but you should be more careful of what you digest from now on. I wanted to die!!

Condoms can be pain sometimes!

One time me and my ex boyfriend were at his house and nobody was home. We headed straight to the bedroom. Things heated up and he put on a condom and got to work. We started in missionary and then he told me he wanted to hit it from behind. We were going at it and when we were done, he pulled out and the condom got stuck in between my butt cheeks! It made a loud SNAP and then the condom smacked his dick and the condom broke. Cum flew everywhere around the room. It was a complete accident.

Drinking makes you stupid!

Me and my ex from years ago were hanging out at a bar he bought me drinks and i bought him some too. Soon we got feeling good and started making out so we went back to my place and i started giving him a blowjob after five minutes of me sucking his penis he started to breath heavy and was almost to an orgasm all of a sudden he starts shaking and yells shove your finger up my bum hole and milk me! I laughed so hard i had to stop he was so embarrassed he wouldn't even talk to me he just left.

Friday, April 12, 2013

Security gaurds are a pain!

So this happened about five years ago when me and my ex were together. We were driving around during the summer and we both got in a mood. So we decided be were just going to park near the football field were NO one goes by late at night. So we were getting it on i was on top and all of a sudden we saw lights i got scared so i got off of him and got dressed as soon as i was pulling up my pants a security guard knocked on the window and said "I know what you're doing and i don't care that you're doing it just don't do it here" when he said that he was looking straight at me. I was so embarrassed because my mom knew the guy!

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Going like Rabbits!

Okay well when I was in high school, I had been dating a guy, he was my first and after that first time, we were like rabbits. Any and everywhere. One day my house was really crowded with family so we decided to take a walk to get away (which also included finding a place to do it). There was a woods behind my house and a cut through it that no one even used anymore, we had gone there a couple times for a quickie before so we decided to do that. We walked off to a little place you couldn't see from the road or the cut through and laid his jacket on the ground. For some reason, that day he had convinced me to get completely naked except for my hoodie. So I was on the bottom, nothing but an unzipped hoodie on and he tells me to switch to doggie style, we transitioned so fast that the hoodie lifted up, pretty much covering nothing but my arms, but heat of the moment, I didn't really care. I'm about to finish when I hear "oh my gosh look at that!" Abruptly my bf stops and I look over to see 2 boys, maybe about 7 or 8 years old, standing next to their bikes that apparently they were walking through the woods as a shortcut to the road. My bf and I sit there frozen for a second, he's still behind me, my boobs are hanging out in plain view then he just jumps in front of me while I scramble to get my clothes on and the boys speed off on their bikes. I got dressed really fast and we decided to go back to my house, thoroughly embarrassed, we get to the road and have to pass the same kids who just caught us in the act as they ride by us giggling.

Wear them slowly

A few years back my ex and I where hanging out at my house. We were really horny and didn't want to get caught so we went outside to fool around. We sat at a bench and started making out, then went to foreplay, and then she decided to tell me that she is on her period. Frustrated I just tell her that we can just have anal sex. So I bend her over the bench and get to work. About ten minutes in she tells me to stop. Naturally during sex I ignore her and keep going. She then more loudly says please stop I'm gonna pee. For what ever reason, I didn't believe her so I started to pound her harder and then all of a sudden I feel something warm on my thigh. It was her pee. She just starts laughing and says I told you to stop!